Three Year Old Empathy

My three year old friend recently threw one of his toys at me.  In an attempt to teach him empathy, I said “That made me feel hurt and sad.  How did it make you feel?”  In a creepy little voice that recalled Damien’s voice in The Omen, he said “Happy.”

Hmm.

“How would it make you feel if I threw this back at you?,” I asked.

“Sad.  And angry.  It would make me angry.”

Aah, he does get it!

But how, friends, do we get that understanding to translate into action.  If you feel sad and angry when someone does something to you, don’t do that same thing to someone else.  It is elementary really.  Right?  Maybe it is too advanced for a three year old.  But surely our friends in congress must understand this?

I am not sure they all do.  In the past week, I have been thinking long and hard about the recent renewal of the Violence Against Women Act.  It was, thankfully, renewed, despite the lack of support for it coming from the Republican sector.  Part of the issue, it seems, is that the proposed act has expanded coverage for LGBT and immigrant women.  The act used to be supported unanimously despite party affiliation.  Because of the increased coverage for LGBT and immigrants, the 31 male Republicans in Senate voted against the bill.   Thankfully, the female Republicans still voted in favor of the coverage.  Kudos to you ladies for protecting your sisters, mothers, and daughters.

As a person of faith, I am disturbed at the idea that their male counterparts think that violence against queer-identified women and immigrant women is okay.  I imagine they would say that they don’t support such violence; that they simply don’t believe that the US government should be providing services to these particular types of victims.  But, really, if they are not willing to put the money and legislation in place, then they are condoning acts of violence against LGBT and immigrant women.

Where violence against human beings is concerned: silence=condoning=complicit in=committing.

The idea that they could vote against protections for any woman- no matter what her sexual, racial, ethnic identity- seems to me a crime; seems to me a demonstration of just how deep hatred and fear can go.  At the heart of it, some people may actually believe that LGBT and immigrant women deserve to be abused- because they are judged to be morally “bad” or “wrong.”  They are “sinning against God” or “taking our jobs.”  First, there is no biblical support for that ideology in the words or life of Jesus.  Second, in a civil society, moral judgments should not inhibit the protection of human rights.  All humans have a right to not be beaten.

It seems elementary.

Whether you just don’t know any better or whether it actually makes you happy, please stop throwing your toys at us.  It makes us sad.  And angry.  It makes us angry.

Nuclear Faith: Iran, Islam, and the Bomb

Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, Iran’s Supreme Leader, has been saying for years that nuclear arms are sinful and are not supported by the tenets of Islam.

You see, part of the core of the Islamic faith is Salaam.  Peace.

Shalom.  Shanti.  Heiwa.  Paz.  Peace.

Western ideas of Islam have been terribly skewed by extremist terrorists who have co-opted the word jihad to wage “holy war.”  But for many Muslims, the jihad to which they are called is more aptly translated as “struggle,” or striving in the way of God.  Peace.

Wouldn’t it would be utterly ironic if the Iranian Muslims, who we stereotype and demonize, end up not creating nuclear bombs because of their core faith values?  That would really stick in the craw of the United States and Israel.  And it may potentially undermine the whole “War on Terror” under which we as a nation have united.

While we can hope towards that, we need also to be wise and realistic.  The fact of the matter is that, despite the Ayatollah’s statements, Iran has been slow to behave in a ways that support peace.  This past weekend the five permanent members of the UN Security Council plus Germany (“P5+1”) met with Iranian leaders to continue negotiations about Iran’s nuclear activities.  While the talks were largely inconclusive, the P5+1 and Iran agreed to come back to the table for continued discussion in May.

President Obama has come under fire for a perceived “willingness” to concede to Iran.  However, as a person of faith, I support the President’s course towards “just peace.”   The Just Peace paradigm outlines 10 preemptive practices of peacemaking that help prevent war.  With Iran, the US is currently attempting to engage in several of these practices, including non-violent direct action, cooperative conflict resolution, strengthening the UN and international efforts for cooperation, and reducing offensive weapons.

Iran has been showing up at the just peace table as well, at least to talk.  At this point, action will go a long way in building trust.  One of the most powerful and verifiable practices is taking independent initiatives to reduce threat.  Iran has come up short on such initiatives and has kept much of its nuclear activity under a veil of secrecy.  Opening its doors to international inspection and taking steps to reduce those activities that appear threatening would go a long way.

At the same time, Iran is, to some extent, the “little guy” at a table with 6 dominating international superpowers; one of which is the only nation to ever use a nuclear weapon in war.  Is Iran the one who needs to prove itself ‘trustworthy’ and not a threat?

President Obama and the P5+1 would do well to consider what action they might take to reduce perceived threat as well.  Are these powerful nations subject to the same sanctions on nuclear activity that they are asking of Iran?  The US reported in 2010 that it maintains an arsenal of 5,113 warheads.  The 2012 budget allocates 6.3 billion over the next four years to maintain and modernize our nuclear weapons arsenal.   We are asking that Iran not produce even 1 nuclear weapon.  That is a hard bargaining position.

Peace is an ongoing process; not a once and for all end.  It requires commitment to dialogue and action from all parties involved.  The road is long.  Never-ending, in fact.  And much fuel is required for the journey.

I don’t think the Ayatollah is off base in turning to Islam on this road.  Harnessing the power that is the nucleus of our faith may be the only thing that can give us the fuel we need.

It is the power of peace.

Salaam.

Hunger for Hope; or Loving the Hunger Games without Making an Idol of Violence

I just treated myself to a second showing of Hunger Games and I left the theater with my hunger for hope temporarily sated.

The main character, Katniss Everdeen, strives for justice, love and connection over against horrifying violence, oppression, and cruelty.  Having just come through the Easter season, that should sound familiar to Christians.  That’s the message of the gospel, and of many world religions.

In Suzanne Collin’s Hunger Games the tyrannical regime of Panem, a nation built on the futuristic ruins of the United States, selects youth from its twelve poor districts to slaughter one another in the annual games. The games are broadcast on national television for the entertainment of the residents of the Capitol, whose children are not part of the lottery.

I have heard multiple complaints from people of faith regarding the Hunger Games’ promotion of and glorification of violence.  Some of these complaints are sound.  We, the real audience, have paid our money to see a fictional audience watch and take pleasure in children killing children.  We should be horrified at the spectacle.  But I’ll admit I got easily caught up in celebrating the deaths of the Career tributes- the four contestants from the more privileged districts who have been educated and trained to be killing machines.  If you do not experience some cognitive dissonance and emotional discomfort in that, then you are missing the point.  We are effectively made into members of the Capitol.

But we have options here.  We can ignore that dissonance, enjoy the show, and go our merry way home without letting the story transform us.  Or, we can use the dissonance and discomfort to fuel our own work towards justice and connection.

Anyone who loves the sci-fi/fantasy genre knows that future worlds are meant to mirror our current world.  This holds true in the Hunger Games. Both Panem and the United States uphold poverty, inequitable distribution of resources, lack of investment in education, discrimination, and maintenance of a lower class whose primary purpose is to produce goods (or be goods) that keep the upper classes going.

Just like the Roman Empire in the first century CE.

We are called to resist that empire and create a different world amongst us.

Katniss does this by not becoming desensitized to violence and suffering despite being forced to participate in a horrifically violent system.  She maintains her humanity and, to the extent possible, honors the humanity of the other tributes.  Though it is a fiction, it is an example of hope and humanity triumphing over the powers that seek to deaden and disconnect us.

I am reminded that keeping hope alive is an act of faith itself; perhaps the most powerful act of faith over against dominating powers.

Postscript:

In an ironic twist, I passed a representative for Save the Children as I was walking home from the movie.  Save the Children!  I didn’t have a minute to spare for him.  I just logged onto their website and made a quick donation.  Not sure if this is faulty logic, but I figure if I can afford to see the Hunger Games twice, I can afford to make a donation to help non-fictional children in need.

Jesus in a hoodie

I can’t get the picture of Jesus in a hoodie out of my head.  Jesus rides into Jerusalem in a hoodie.  Jesus cleanses the temple in a hoodie.  Jesus calls the children to him in a hoodie.  Jesus teaches the Beatitudes in a hoodie.

On Wednesday, protesters marched in the Million Hoodie March in New York City to show solidarity with the family of Trayvon Martin.  Seventeen year old Trayvon was shot by a community crime watch volunteer in a Florida suburb on February 26.  As a black adolescent male wearing a hoodie, he ‘looked suspicious.’  In reality, he was walking home from a convenience store with skittles and iced tea.  There is a chance that the man who shot him will not be held responsible for killing a black youth without cause.

I am heartbroken.  Heartbroken for Trayvon’s family.  Heartbroken for this society which says that black adolescent males are a threat simply for walking on the wrong street, at the wrong time, in the wrong clothing.  Heck, society says that black men of any age are a threat even when walking on the ‘right’ street, at the ‘right’ time, in the ‘right’ clothing.

I am not innocent.  I lock my doors when I drive through Uptown.  I try to be subtle about it, but I can’t help but think that the people on the sidewalk can hear the click of the locks.  That click always sounds louder in those situations.  Like it is echoing “unsafe” and “other” through the car.

I am not innocent.  In my recent online dating extravaganzas, I went on my first date with a man of color.  I felt distinctly more anxious and nervous about that date then I have about any of the first dates I have gone on with white people.  My anxiety was not based on anything that Mike had expressed or appeared to be.  It was based on stereotypes generated by media images and stories that barrage our psyches daily.  In reflection, I was able to observe what was happening in me…ahh, that’s racism folks…and do some of the internal work that was needed to redirect my irrational fears.  Though I am a white woman of good will, the future will bring more situations that reveal more anti-racist work that I need to do.  I am not there yet.

We, as a society, are not there yet.

Created in the image of God.

We get real confused about that.  We start thinking that God is in our image- white, black, Asian, Latino, fat, thin, male, female.  The dominant culture dictates the image of God.  Those who don’t fit the image are relegated to the category of other, sinner, deviant.

Created in the image of God.

The image of God is the poor, the vulnerable, the oppressed, the unjustly murdered.

This week, Jesus is wearing a hoodie.

A Grave Sin: The Catholic Church Just Keeps on Digging

On February 25, Rev. Marcel Guarnizo refused to serve communion to Barbara Johnson, a lesbian woman, at her own mother’s funeral.   Ms. Johnson reported that “He put his hand over the  body of Christ and looked at me and said, ‘I can’t give you Communion because you live with a woman, and in the eyes of the church, that is a sin.’ ” Yesterday, it was announced that the priest has been placed on administrative leave for ‘intimidating behavior,’ not as a direct result of the communion incident.

In the days that followed that mass, the archdiocese issued an apology and made a public statement published by the Post explaining how the Catholic Church understands communion.  This includes the statement, “if a person is conscious of having committed a grave sin, he or she may not receive Communion…”  In other words, Ms. Johnson should have known better than to have gone up for the sacrament.

It is the Catholic Church, not Ms. Johnson, however, that has a “grave” problem.

I grew up Catholic: baptized, reconciled, and confirmed.  So I am among the privileged that get to take communion in any Catholic Church at any time.  Once a Catholic, always a Catholic, right?

At least until the presiding priest starts to judge whether I am right with God or not.  Once the priests start to do that, where will it end?  Welcome to the slippery slope.

How are we determining “grave sin” here?

If it’s breaking one of the commandments listed in Leviticus, I’m pretty sure we would find there is almost no one qualified to come to the altar to received communion.  Did you eat shellfish (Lev 11:9-12)?  Don’t come.  Are you a man who has shaved your beard or sideburns (Lev 19:27)?  Stay seated.

But maybe we are talking about the Ten Commandments (Ex 20).  Surely breaking those would be grave.

Murder? Check.

Adultery?  Sure.

Theft?  I can get behind that.

Taking the Lord’s name in vain?  God, no.

The list goes on and on.  Yet somehow, in all of these commandments, some churches and religious leaders have determined that it is a woman living with a woman in a loving relationship that is the grave sin.

Where would Jesus weigh in on this?  He says “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the greatest and first commandment.  And a second is like it: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’” (Matt 22:37-39)

The greatest and first, followed by a second that is like it.  Love God.  Love your neighbor.  That is what leads to a state of Grace, friends.

So, my recommendation to the Catholic Church is that they use that standard to measure grave sin.  If you have failed to love your neighbor, no communion for you.

I’ll send a memo to the wafer makers.  Their business is about to enter deep recession.

Hunger Games 2012

I, like many Suzanne Collins fans, am gearing up for the March 23^rd release of the Hunger Games film based on the first book in her popular young adult trilogy.  Collins tells the tale of a dystopian future where kids are elected to fight to the death in a televised competition for the well-to-do in the Capitol.  I am sure I will have more to say about the theology of the arena as the day approaches.  But, for now, while we are all busy polishing our gold mockingjay pins, there are real hunger games brewing in our country.

Recent studies have demonstrated what we all already know- hunger, or ‘food insecurity,’ deeply impacts a person’s ability to be healthy and productive.  As I read the summary of these studies, I was reminded of the work of educator and reformer Paulo Freire, who experienced years of childhood hunger.  In Letter to Cristina, Freire recounts “I didn’t understand anything because of my hunger.  I wasn’t dumb.  It wasn’t lack of interest.  My social condition didn’t allow me to have an education.”  Freire came to understand that one of the ways in which the dominant culture promulgates oppression is by creating a situation in which the oppressed are kept ignorant, hungry, and miserable.  The physiological lethargy that results from being kept in a state of hunger (and anxiety) makes it near impossible for the oppressed to fully engage in the business of learning, thinking, or fighting back.

Hunger keeps the oppressed class oppressed.

Jesus got this and he tried to change it.  “Whoever has two coats must share with anyone who has none; and whoever has food must do likewise.” (Lk 3:11)  “For I was hungry and you gave me food.” (Matt 25:35)  He fed the five thousand (Matt 14:16-21); and then another four thousand (Matt 15:32-38) for good measure.

Unfortunately today, hungry families can’t wander down to the local park and pick up some bread and fish from Jesus and the disciples.  What they can do is receive food assistance from the government sponsored food assistance program.  SNAP (Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program) kept 3.9 million people from falling into poverty in 2010.  An additional 42 million people received assistance through the program.  The Farm Bill, which includes SNAP, is up for reauthorization in 2012.  SNAP benefits need to be increased so that families can afford to buy the government approved Thrifty Meal Plan, which is the cheapest nutritionally adequate diet upon which benefit levels are set.  However, congress is not set to repeat the miracle of the loaves and fishes.  Rather than taking what exists and multiplying it, several recommendations for cutbacks are under consideration.

Cutbacks mean increased hunger.  Increased hunger means increased oppression.

You can start to contact your state representatives and senators now to let them know that you support expanding SNAP for the vulnerable men, women, and children in your community.

Tell them:  Don’t play political games with hunger.

This safety net needs to catch enough fish to feed the millions.

Ashes, Ashes, We All Fall Down

And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner. (1 Tim 2:14)

These ashes are a testament to women who have been silenced, shamed and controlled physically, psychically and emotionally.

The millennia old war on women is in full swing this election season and it is giving me some serious nightmares.  We are in the ashen places, friends.  There is no doubt about it.

Writhe in agony, O Daughter of Zion, like a woman in labor. (Micah 4:10)

Whether it is about women not being competent enough to make moral and ethical decisions or about some old white man making a “joke” about holding aspirin between the knees as a birth control method, the integrity and equality of women is under attack.

Today is a day that we face not only our own brokenness but also the brokenness of our world.

Religion has been and continues to be used to oppress women.  The bible has played a part in this oppression.  Read out of its historical context, scripture has been manipulated to condone unequal power relationships and colonization of women’s bodies and psyches.

And if it is a female, set her value at thirty shekels. (Lev 27:4)

We must challenge at every point any attempts to use scripture to belittle women.  Because the larger part of the bible (the gospels in particular) proclaims the opposite of that.  As surely as Jesus overturned tables in the temple, he overturned the power structures of the day.  He ate with the outcasts and touched the untouchable.  In so doing, he broke down the barriers that the elite had erected to protect their wealth and power.

The good news is that we are all beloved of God.  The good news is that grace overcomes fear and shame.  The good news is that even on the day that we acknowledge the ashen-ness of the world, nothing separates us from the love of God.

Jesus said to the woman, "Your faith has saved you; go in peace." (Luke 7:50)

Watch out, GOP, out of the ashes                                     the Phoenix rises.

(Special thanks to Jami Huisjen Scott for her artistic collaboration and photographs.  Please credit her if you re-use the images.) 

Fat FAT Tuesday

This is not about a deep and abiding love for cream filled donuts.

Fat Tuesday is the day to gorge if you want to.  Tomorrow we begin the journey of preparation for Easter.  In my Catholic childhood home, lent meant sacrificing something we loved for six weeks.  Most often this meant chocolate.  As I have matured, I have come to understand lent as a time to “trim the fat.”  What is weighing us down?  What is keeping us from being the best us?

Obama’s recent budget made some severe cuts to important programs (like LIHEAP) that assist the most poor and vulnerable of our nation.  These cuts go much deeper than the fat.  They slice into some tissue and muscle as well.  What does lent mean to those who live in poverty?  What can lent mean when every day is a struggle to feed and support one’s family?  What if there is no fat to trim?

Today is Fat Tuesday.  A day to consume a little extra- the most buttery, sweetest, richest treats one can get one’s hands on.  To celebrate this day, I direct you to these videos by the Brave New Foundation on “Who are the 1%?,” which outline what life looks like when every day is Fat Tuesday.

The imbalance of wealth between the Fat Tuesday-ers and those living in a Lenten world is not sustainable.

“From everyone to whom much has been given, much will be required.” (Lk 12:48)

I’m just going to ask, in case no one has ever asked directly.  I am a big advocate of expressing your needs and giving the other a chance to respond.  So, I am just going to ask.

Rob, will you please pay 1 billion out of Walmart’s 400 billion annual revenue to cover the cost of the public health care that your employees use annually?

Lloyd, can you please just give the 138 million you made over the last 4 years at Goldman Sachs to fund housing for low income families?

Pete, can you please allocate a substantial portion of your Blackstone Group income to cover the cost of utilities for disabled and elderly in our country?

Jamie, can you give the 100 million you made in the last five years at JP Morgan Chase to the struggling homeowners who can’t cover their mortgages?

Rupert, I don’t even know what to ask of you and News Corp.

How many cream filled donuts does one person actually need to eat?

Gray Anatomy

“All right; but we’re not on the same page.” (Owen)

“Because I don’t do what you want me to do.” (Cristina)

“Because you had an abortion.” (Owen)

On Friday, I watched about three hours of the Oversight Committees hearing on “Lines Crossed: Separation of Church and State. Has the Obama Administration Trampled on Freedom of Religion and Freedom of Conscience?” (Click here to see video) Two panels spoke over the course of about six hours.  Much had been made of the photo of the first panel that did not include any women.  When I found out the second panel had two women on it (Dr. Allison Dabbs Garrett of Oklahoma Christian University and Dr. Laura Champion of Calvin College), I was too curious to not invest some time.

Then I unwound by watching Thursday night’s episode of Grey’s Anatomy.  While watching Cristina and Owen battle it out in a couples counseling session (see above quote), it struck me.  This, friends, is not some gray and murky territory around freedom of religion and freedom of conscience.  No.  For many of the organizations represented at the hearing, this is about abortion.  Six of the nine panelist stated that the part of the HHS mandate that their organization disagrees with is the provision of abortifacients, such as Ella and Plan B.  (The Catholics are against the whole idea of contraception, but I refer you to one of my peer’s blogs for that discussion).

So I have been reflecting on abortion, the personhood initiative, and the kingdom/kindom of God for the last couple of days.

I will be honest- an ethic of abortion is a very, very gray area for me.  My own experiences in the fertility realm have informed my uterus’s pro-life stance.  I spent a year of my life undergoing unsuccessful fertility procedures.  You can bet that each cycle brought with it prayers upon prayers that that sperm would find that egg and that that zygote would implant.  Through the whole process, it felt like I already had a relationship with the little being that never actually manifest.  On the other hand, one of my closest friends was pregnant for almost seven months before she felt like there was another sentient being growing inside her.  Before that, it just felt like she had gas.   I tell you this to illustrate that every woman’s experience of her body and her procreative capacities is different.  There is no one rule.  There is no one moment when a woman understands that there is another being inside of her.  It is arbitrary.  And it is one of the great mysteries of our existence.

Mysteries are by nature gray.  We can’t control them or ordain them.

But there are things that are not gray.  My deep trust of women is not gray.  Women who have knowledge, resources, and support can make responsible reproductive decisions.  If we take the debate down another layer, we can see that this is not about abortion even- but rather about a world that still practices animal husbandry on women.  It is about a world where women are not afforded the knowledge, resources, and support they need to make their own reproductive decisions.

If the kingdom/kindom of God is the way of being for which we are striving, how would women be treated and behave there?  No- they would not be running around having abortions with reckless abandon.  (That’s not the goal, I promise you).  They wouldn’t need to do that.  Because the foundation of such a place is pro-woman (and pro-man), pro-wholeness, pro-body, pro-pleasure, pro-respect, pro-education, pro-creation, pro-responsibility.  In the kingdom/kindom of God, we have full say over what goes into and what comes out of our vaginas.  We can make responsible decisions based on the consequences of either.  From an appropriate age, we are resourced with information and tools that allow us to be safe and accountable to each other and the ones we may bring forth.

If we took the time and energy we invested in creating, countering, and defending the HHS mandate and put it toward loving and strengthening women, what would happen?  Can we spend less time on the smoke and mirrors around religious conscience and more time pulling up the root systems that disempower women?

Chairman Issa, we’re not on the same page.

Be grateful, homeless man

As a person of faith, I have determined that I would try to take seriously Jesus’ directive to “give to everyone who begs from you.” (Lk 6:30)

I found it’s harder than it sounds.  I learned a lesson about myself, my faith, and I think it’s a lesson we need to learn in our public policy debates.

Here’s what happened:

I was at a red light getting onto Lakeshore Drive a couple of days ago and there was the standard homeless person with cup in hand.  I give to homeless people if I happen to have cash or change.  I will throw dollar bills into the change holder in my car specifically for this purpose.  I’ve gone back and forth on this across my professional career as a social worker.  I was told by some of the homeless clients I worked with that I should never give money- that it would always be used for drugs or alcohol.  I was told by another portion of clients that I should give money- that most are going to by food.  There is no way to know where that money will go.  I don’t need to know.  Homeless adults can make decisions about how to best use their resources.

On this particular day, I rolled down the window and was pulling out a dollar bill from amongst several dollar bills.  As I put a dollar into the man’s cup, he said “one more, one more.”  “What?” I asked perplexed.  “One more, I am homeless,” he said, looking down at the change holder where there were several more dollars.  My jaw dropped in shock, and I said (yes I did), “What?  No. That’s for the next homeless person!”  The red light changed and I drove off feeling irate and attacked.

I mean, I gave this guy a buck.  How many people give a buck?  That’s pretty generous.  I can’t believe he wasn’t just grateful for that.  And I was convinced that dollar was going directly to a dime bag.

So, part of me only wants to give to someone who is grateful for my charity?  I can drive away feeling self-satisfied and he walks away……grateful?  That I gave him a dollar?

What was I thinking? Be grateful, homeless man, that you are an African American man in a country that upholds itself as “‘post-racist’”?   Be grateful that you probably didn’t have the resources or support you needed to be a successful student?  Be grateful that services for homeless individuals and people struggling with addiction and those suffering from chronic mental illness have been cut in the past decade?  Be grateful that the FY 2013 budget will undoubtedly mean more cuts for these services? Be grateful that you have been caught by Romney’s less than ample safety net that catches only some of the very poor? Clearly, it has not caught you.

Right after the text where Jesus teaches, “give to everyone who begs from you,” is the golden rule.  Do to others as you would have them do to you.

Next time, neighbor, you get the second dollar.  And anyone who dares quote the Bible better be willing to work for better public policy than the tattered ‘safety net’ we have now.